Where Do you Begin?

Updated: Apr 9, 2018

Self love, that's easy right? I'm gonna look at myself everyday in the mirror and tell myself how special I am and how much I love myself. Simple! Easy, done! I love myself. WRONG!! Self love is a process that is not that easy. One of the very first steps of self love is discovering what caused you to stop loving yourself.  You need to as yourself "What has negatively impacted my life to the point that I feel less than?" "What is the roadblock in my life, that is preventing me from loving myself? Was there some type of trauma that occurred?" Self love is is like an iceberg. All you see on the surface is someone that does not like themselves, but underneath the sea there are struggles that are unseen. Issues that may go so deep, that you may not have realized were there.

Some symptoms of low self esteem are: being unable to accept compliments, down playing accomplishments, self harm, depression, poor boundaries, lack of boundaries, being a people pleaser, anxiety isolation, negative self talk, hypersensitive, feeling the need to be perfect and envy (this is not a comprehensive list). Struggles with self esteem can stem from bullying, unhealthy relationships, parent/child relationships, media, drug use, cultural views/values, abuse and being unable to create an identity.

So how do you address these unseen, deep rooted struggles/issues? Self reflection and patience are vital. When I say self reflection, I mean looking into your life and beginning to identify situations that took place in your life that lead you down this path. Really taking the time to look inward and being brave enough to address these situations. With the help of a proper mental health provider, you will be able to overcome these negative feelings about yourself. This can only take place when YOU feel the need to address these issues and are able accept the difficult times within your life, that have impacted your self esteem. Never forget how strong you are and the ability you have to be resilient.

Check out this YouTube video regarding self love:

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